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Don't start a fire without first building a fire ring. There are a number of way of doing this. The most common is to place rocks in a 3 foot diameter or larger circle. Be sure to clear out the area immediately adjacent to the ring of rocks. Using your shovel, dig out the entire inside of the circle 2 inches deep and place the dirt on both the inside and the outside of the rock circle. You'll need this dirt when it's time to extinguish the fire. If rocks are not available, you will dig a 3 foot diameter hole it the ground approximately 6 inches deep. Again, keep the dirt for extinguishing the fire.
Camping is better with a fire. So knowing how to douse a fire is an important camping skill. This is not something you can do in 5 minutes. It takes a little planning and care. During the last couple of hours in camp spend some time working the fire and especially the embers. With a shovel expose as many of the embers as you can. This exposure causes them to burn off faster. Once the embers look like they are out (they're not!!!) cover them with the dirt you stored when you built the fire ring. Mix the dirt and ash well. When you think the fire is out (it's not!!!) it's time to douse the dirt and ash mixture with water. When car camping, it's easy to have lots of water available. If you're carrying the water on your body, that's more difficult. Take your time and make sure the fire is completely out.
Several ways to start a fire under wet conditions:
1) Vehicle cigarette lighter.
2) Vehicle battery (wire and cloth).
3) Road flare.
4) Lighter fluid/Gasoline/Propane.
Each of these methods will get the flame going, but without kindling, it won't be going for long. Be sure to gathering dry or near dry kindling before attempting to ignite the fire.